When Your Lover Is a Liar

Forward has written several self-help classics about lousy, damaging relationships (Emotional Blackmail; Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them). Once again, she combines gentle empathy with no-nonsense advice as she examines men who lie to women and what women can do about it. Her goal, she writes, addressing women who have been lied to, is to "transform the wounds of betrayal and deception into the wisdom that will illuminate your path." From sexual infidelity to financial disaster, hidden addictions to secret ex-wives, Forward focuses on the serious lies that "involve an intent to deceive" and always "harm us and our relationships." She explains men's various motives, beliefs and behavior patterns, as well as women's frequent denial, "collusion" and acceptance of blame. Forward clearly describes the kind of liar she calls "the sociopath" and sternly warns women to steer clear of the beast and, if already involved with one, to "leave immediately." She then moves on to specific steps for confronting the (non-sociopathic) liar with the reality of his behavior and advises women how to set conditions for continuing the relationship and how to get support from friends, family and professional counselors. Buttressing her advice with examples from her practice, Forward offers some straight talk to women who may have forgotten what candor sounds like.

Have you ever been lied to by a lover? In this straightforward and supportive book, therapist Susan Forward profiles the wide variety of liars, shows you how to deal with the lies -- from the benign to the lethal -- that these men spin, and gives practical strategies to stop them before they ruin your relationship and, ultimately, your life.

Once you find out the truth about your lover and his lies, what do you do? Forward offers practical, proven, step-by-step methods for healing the wounds caused by his deception and betrayal. She provides all the communication and behavioral techniques you need to deal with a lover's lies, telling you exactly what to say, when and how to respond to his reactions, and how to present your requirements for staying in the relationship. With understanding and compassion, she helps you decide whether your relationship can be saved and shows you how to move beyond doubt and regret if you feel that it can't. But whether you stay or go, you can learn to love and trust again.

Susan Forward, Ph.D., is an internationally acclaimed therapist, lecturer, and author. Her books -- which include the #1 New York Times bestsellers Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them and Toxic Parents, as well as Emotional Blackmail, Obsessive Love, Betrayal of Innocence, and Money Demons -- have been translated into more than fifteen languages. In addition to more than twenty years in private practice, she has served as a group therapist, instructor, and consultant in many Southern California medical and psychiatric facilities. She is much sought after as a guest in the media, and she hosted a daily national call-in radio program on ABC talk radio for six years.

"Betrayal goes way beyond sexual affairs to include a host of lies and secrets. When Your Lover Is a Liar is an outstanding guide for helping women reduce the trauma of such interpersonal violations, choose a direction, and rebuild their sense of self." 

-- Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D., author of After the Affair

"In this landmark book, Forward describes how lying and betrayal take place in loving relationships. In this practical guide, filled with helpful clinical anecdotes, she shows how people can move to new dimensions of love and healing. A must read!" 

-- Rabbi Levi Meier, Ph.D., chaplain, Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, clinical psychologist, author of Moses, the Prince of Egypt: His Life, Legend & Message for Our Lives 

"Lying is a surefire way to demolish self-esteem and destroy relationships. This very useful guide shows us how to detect lies in those we love, confront the liar, and work through the betrayal so we emerge stronger and wiser." 

-- Ellen McGrath, PH.D., chair, American Psychological Association, National Task Force on Women and Depression

"Susan Forward does it again with this powerful book that will go a long way toward helping women regain their balance and self-esteem in the aftermath of betrayal." 

-- June M. Reinisch, Ph.D., director emeritus, the Kinsey Institute, author of The Kinsey Institute New Report on Sex

"Susan Forward's wisdom and compassion shines through in this excellent guide for women about a potentially devastating experience in their lives. Fascinating reading!" 

-- Susan Jeffers, Ph.D., author of Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway and End the Struggle and Dance with Life

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